Surrounded with Pain
Last week there as been so much sadness surrounding me. My husband and I have been together for 9 years and married for 7. We have been trying to have a baby for a few years and nothing is happening. I use to think all a person have to do is open up their legs and eventually they will become pregnant. Yes, very ignorant to think I know but I never knew that there were so many women suffering from infertility. Or better yet, I did not knew infertility existed until I was affected from it.
Last week, I found out a young lady who I don’t care for is having her second baby. I silently cried last week when I found out that she was 5 weeks pregnant. I am typically happy for everyone who is pregnant but for this one person I couldn’t be happy for because I know what type of person she is and feel sad for what value she is going to teach the children. She and her hubby is like trailer trash. They see children as an income and a way to stay in Germany. Germany do not like to separate the parent from the child. The mother visa was running out that they planned to have their first child before her visa had expired, to make sure she had a guaranteed to stay inside Germany (this was not my conclusion, this is what she bragged about). When a person have a child in Germany they also receive money for them until they turn 18 years old. The minimum is 300€ whether if a person work or not. This is call “child money” (in English). Another additional payment the parents will receive is the “parents money” up to 14 months. It is dependent on income family allowance of up to 1800€ per month paid. There are lot more benefits when having a child in Germany.
Saturday we bumped into one of our neighbor who have cancer. I have two neighbors who have cancer and they are struggling with the demon of cancer. The neighbor we bumped into at the market is in the hospital almost every two weeks due to an infection. Last week she found out she have a blood clot in her artery located where are left shoulder is. This week she will be in the hospital being operated on. Since last year when she found out she had cancer she been operated on over 4 times already. As she said, “it is always something”. I pray that this will be the last operation and she get well.
Saturday afternoon as I was walking my husband to the car (he was on his way to go to Japan), I seen another neighbor who also have cancer. She bought tears to my eyes. She have lost so much weight, looked so pale, and was very weak. She was being escorted out the door by her son’s arm. When saying hello to her her voice was like a whisper.
I went to my flat and sat down to myself fill with thoughts. Thoughts on how so many people are suffering around me with their own problems. I sigh to myself and let the negative feelings I had about the chick I mention above leave my soul. Since yesterday afternoon I have found peace with myself and let things go. We, as people, can not change what life have giving us. However, we can work around some of the difficulty of life and “try” to make the best out of it.
Not Being Afraid to Eat
Today was truly a test for me. This morning I met up with a group of friends for breakfast. A typical German breakfast has lot of breads, meats, cheeses, a plate of vegetable and fruits. I mention to everyone that I am on a diet and has lost 29lbs so far since January. I can only eat certain amount of food and need to watch my intake since later hubby and I have plans to go out with friends to a Mexican restaurant.
I was amaze of how much I ate and felt so full and actually proud of myself. For breakfast I had Camille Tea just one cup without sugar, a boil egg minus the yolk, 3 strawberries, one pickle, 5 cherry tomatoes, half of a red bell pepper, a couple glass of water, and a long sesame seed roll. The bread is the down fall of the calorie intake and really was not needed but I surely did enjoy it. I cut the bread roll into thee sections going the long way. So as we eat and talk I can take my time slowly enjoying the bread. Normally at our breakfast meet up. I would eat a few rolls cover with meat, cheese, and jam and my favorite which is a pretzel. Today I had self control and told myself that I can only consume a set calories if I want to enjoy dinner later. I can forget about lunch because breakfast had rolled over to lunch.
So what I am stating is if you have a set calorie before going out and everyone around you knows. You will not fail on your diet or over eat. Your conscious should start kicking in as soon as you sit down.
Muesli Cereal
A couple of weeks ago I wrote “Healthy Pancakes worth the Calories“. Which was about adding Muesli/Musli as an ingredients to make the pancake fibrous. It darn on to me after writing that post that some people might not know what musli was and that I should of wrote an introduction to it than the recipe post. Therefore I just would like to give you a quick run down of Musli. Sorry about this post being late. My router crash on me and finally had time to buy a new one today.
Musli is a popular breakfast cereal based on uncooked rolled oats, fruit and nuts. It was developed around 1900 by Swiss physician Maximilian Bircher-Benner for patients in his hospital. It is available as a packaged dry form, or it can be made fresh also gluten free.
Muesli is a loose mixture of mainly rolled oats and/or cornflakes together with various pieces of dried fruit, nuts, and seeds. It commonly contains other rolled cereal grains such as wheat or rye flakes as well. There are many varieties, some of which may also contain honey, spices, or chocolate. This dry packaged muesli can be stored for many months. It can be served quickly after mixing it with milk, yogurt, coffee, hot chocolate, fruit juice, or even just plain water. If desired, pieces of fresh fruit may be added. Alternatively, the mix may be soaked overnight in milk and then served with fresh fruit or compote to taste.
Wiki
Muesli is one of the healthiest breakfast cereal because it contains all the need of a good diet such as fruits, fiber, protein and calcium therefore it gives you the full benefit of a breakfast/snack or meal eating muesli equals in eating 2 fruits and all the needed protein and fiber for the rest of the day.
Where can you find it? In the cereal isle of your store. Some musli are higher in calorie depending on the content of what is in the bag. Please check the calorie content if your looking into loosing weight. I hope you all are having a great week! Looking forward to talk about food in two more weeks! Have a great one!
Healthy Pancakes worth the Calories
Today will be my first Friday posting pictures with cooking directions on what I am eating on my food journey. Many of my meals repeat itself so I will be writing every two weeks a food/cooking post. I will also introduce to you food items I am eating to guide me with my weight, which has nothing to do with cooking…not all food items need to be cook or incorporate into a meal. If interested in following along in my food journey just subscribe to easily follow me along or visit me here every two weeks on Friday. Almost everyone love a nice fluffy pancake. At times we end up eating too much or drown it in syrup. I know I use to love to go to Denny’s and the Pancake House. I use to eat tons of pancakes and drown it in syrup so that it would not be dry and top it off with bananas on top and between each sections. Not knowing then only half a banana was good enough and that banana for fruit intake is a bit high in calories. Now I understand when my mom use to say I am eating too much bananas slow it down. She is a health nut. I wish I was more like her sometimes. Since I been on my “cutting down” journey I change around my approach to food. Let me warn you now that I eat regular meals I just cut down the portion greatly compare to what I ate in the past. I now take an account for everything I place inside my mouth. One day I was in the kitchen and my hubby request for Pancakes. When I was getting the mixture together I said to myself why not make it a fibrous pancake. Fibrous to me is food that help assist the bowel to flow easily. So I made Musli Pancakes for both him and I.
Musli Pancake w/Apple
1/4 Musli
1/4 Pancake Mix (or you can use 1/4 Wheat/White Flour with 1tsp Baking Soda)
1/3 Water
1 Apple
1 TBS Syrup
*Optional = Cinnamon sprinkle on top of of Apple slices (just a little)
I am sure you’re looking at the syrup amount and thinking I must be nuts. That won’t do it. Funny thing it does. The moisture/juice in the apple help give you that moisture you are craving to go with your pancakes. The syrup is just a nice little sugar burst most of us grave for. I did not use eggs, sugar, salt, or milk in my ingredients. I like to keep things simple, have a meal I can enjoy without feeling guilty later about the calories or working out like a mad women to burn what I ate. Plus you would not even notice by the taste egg, milk, salt, and sugar are not use. There are so many variation of Musli Pancake on the net. At first I thought I was a mad genius in the kitchen until I looked around and found out other people was on the same track as I, but they used milk, sugar, eggs, and salt. My recipe above can only make two nice size pancake. This plate with a nice cup of tea, glass of water, or small cup of coffee will get you full. If you do try this recipe please come back and let me know what you think. Guten Appetit!
Self Challenge

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I am a maniac and also lazy. Got to keep it real. Every year people make New Year resolution. Every year I come up with at least one thing to focus on the whole year. Which is perfect for me because my brain is always scatter everywhere. Last year my goal was to stop biting my nails. I am in my 30’s and too old to continue with that filthy habit. I never bite my nails out of boredom just because it was just there on my hand holding up my face and too close to my mouth. The temptation was too easy. To stop biting my nails I went to the nail shop once a month to get acrylic on my nails for a whole year. You know that hard stuff that women have on their nail when it is not theirs. Well I learned my nails grow quick and after one month it was my own nails getting acrylic applied too. That experiment costed me 480 Euros. You know what I could of did with that money?!?! Never the less I stop my filthy habit of biting my nails. I don’t even have urge to put my fingers in my mouth and when they are on my face I don’t recognize them any more. I guess that was money well spent.
This year I have two challenges. One is from last year which will roll on over to this year and probably next. Which is stop cutting my hair short every summer. So far the length is sitting on my shoulder. My aim is to have it sitting completely or at least half way on my chest. The new challenge this year is cutting down my portion and getting in exercise atleast 3 days a week. If more is done great if not, no sweat, get it no sweat. Okay I should of mention I am very corny too:) Another part of the challenge is to see how much weight can a person really lose in a year. Yes I know obstacle will hinder a person performance and goal, but that is life…right?
I will not state what I weighed at the end of December 2011, but I will tell you I have lost 17lbs since 31 of December. By minimal exercise of 5 to 20 minutes a day. I will not say I work out every day, because that would be a lie to you and myself. One week I broke my challenge rule and did not exercise, the first week I exercise every day, and the other weeks I did my minimal three days. I eat a sensible small breakfast just to jump start my metabolism so that it won’t get wacky. Lunch, I eat once again a sensible meal. When I have appointments to go to I carry fruits with me in my pockets so I won’t get tempted to buy junk or stop in at the bakery as I done many time last year. For dinner I eat the typical normal dinner. I only cut my portion in half and measure things more. I was amaze how tricky the brain is. I was full from dinner and last year I was eating double portion but never knew…I always fill up the plate and to my eyes it look like it was not too much.
I know it is possible for me to lose 20lbs a month if I exercise everyday and continue eating as I am. I done it many times. My problem is that once I get to my goal I get to cocky and blow back up but double from what I was because I stop caring. Saying that my challenge to myself once the year is over I will start the maintenance process and try not to get relax or cocky. The older we get it takes time to heal and to lose weight. On Fridays or every other Friday I plan to share with you some of my meals and food I eat to lose weight. At the end of the year I will give you the result of how much weight I have loss.
Do you have a challenge for yourself if so may I ask what it is?
Are the Elderly more Active in Europe than America
Since I been living in Germany I have took in many comparison of America and Europe. One comparison is that the elderly people here are very active and mobile. Whether on crutches, in wheel chair, or rolling crutches with a basket attach. Great to use for shopping bags and to carry big purses. I have been living here for a couple of years now and visited many part of Europe. I am hoping to see all that is on my traveling list of Europe before I turn 50 than venture out to Australia and Africa. We are travelers but since there is only one income we have slow down a great deal from the 10 years we been together.
Everyday I try to go for a walk even if it is just to the park 30 minutes away to sit down, relax, and enjoy the simplicity of life. During my walk and relaxation I sit and think to myself of how many active older people are in Europe. There are many bicyclers. Some walk with not so much energy and others walk quicker and stronger than me. I have to smile when they past me by. I talked to a couple of my neighbors always about my insight to hear their view on the topic. There are not many nursing home here and I totally understand why. In America from all the places I have live and visited I barely seen the elderly walking or outside, other than to take care of their property. I seen many in nursing home and assistant living. It is just weird really.

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What are these elderly people in Europe doing to stay active and strong. I honestly can’t tell you. All I know in Germany they eat a lot of fibrous bread. There are so many variation of bread it is crazy and bakery at almost every corners with tasty goodies. You would think there would be a lot of fat people in Europe with all the bakeries and easy to reach pastries, that they actually consume! But there are not a lot of fat people here as myself (I have nothing against the fat and lovelies). They walk and bicycle a lot if they do not have to use their cars to drive far distance. Some even take public transportation such as buses and trains because sometime it is cheaper than gas and walk the remaining way to their destination. The people here are very active. Breakfast is typically but not always bread, lunch meat/sausage or jam with butter/Nutella with a cup of tea and coffee “almost every morning”. My sister in law think American breakfast is too much food to consume in the morning. Lunch is pretty simple when at home which is almost like breakfast. Dinner is normal food such as potato with salad and meat or soup with bread. Before dinner is “Tea Time”. Tea time is consist of a slice of cake and tea/coffee. I hate tea time, lol. I am not a cake person.
The next time you go shopping or for a walk take a look to see if you see many elderly people walking or bicycling. I be interested to hear your observation and your thought.
I Got the Job
I got it! I got it! I got the job and it starts end of Feb. I explained that I have an operation coming up and I will need a few weeks to heal up. He said no problem I can start Feb 24. I have to work 3 days for free almost like a probation period. I told him no problem. I am so sike this was my first interview and will be my first job in Germany. My pay is only 400E a month but I am happy with it. It is not in my field of expertise but it will help me learn the language quicker since I will have more people to talk with and help out with some of the bills around the house. I almost feel like my whole self again. I am going to help contributing instead of minusing. Happy dance happy dance!